OBSERVATIONS
You do notice the little things. In themselves, they might not be very important but it is what they represent that is significant. After strokes, MS is the most common disabling factor that has led to our residents needing this accommodation. In a peculiar way, it is like the way some people are just after they buy a new car: you suddenly notice every time you see another one on the road -- there's another -- there's another -- there's another etc. It's one of those conditions or diseases that causes you constantly to make comparisons between your situation and others'. Have you lost any sensation here/there? Do you have difficulty doing this/that? What were your first symptoms? How long have you had MS? What medication are you on? Does it work? Have you ever considered suicide? That's just the tip of the iceberg: there are always new questions you think of asking. We all have our own distinct variation on the theme which is why it is so frustrating -- especially for those of us with Type 'A' MS, a minority who present differently.
We do have a suicide prospect. I mean that the poor sod creates alarm and a search party is organised every time he goes wandering outside. Why? Because he might try and motor into the pond, trundle in front of a passing car or find access to a pair of scissors. Or something. Okay, he is utterly hacked off with living in a nursing home and often expresses himself in "I wish I was dead" terms. Sounds like a beacon of sanity to me. That, and the fact that he has encountered carers with questionable comprehension skills or basic empathy with disabled people. In nursing homes, that's a given. (Do you detect a general cynicism in these matters? Well done.)
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